Training Husbands on Valentine’s Day

Training Husbands on Valentine's Day 076
Love on our Wedding Day: September 26th, 1998

[su_heading size=”18″]Training Your Husband on Valentine’s Day[/su_heading]

Last year I wrote about Valentine’s Day and guess what? One year later, it still sucks!

I can think of no worse day than Monday to express ones love and so we celebrated a steak and potato Valentines Day Dinner last night.

The evening before I had opened up a cooking magazine and fallen into a photo of a family seated at the dining table together happily eating a steak and potato dinner. Looking up from the magazine I stared out the window realizing that all of these years, Ive been trying too hard. This is the way it’s gonna be from here on in, I thought, SIMPLE.

The next morning I woke up and fluttered around the house putting flowers in all of the rooms and making heart shaped pancakes for Valentines Day, hearts popping out of my eyes for my beloved family.and then they woke up.

Valentine’s Day Sucks:

I thought we were going to wait to exchange gifts, Wade said sleepily glancing over at the beautiful orange flowers, the color of our wedding roses, set on his bedside table. Then I went into Axels room with my side kick, Muki. Mommy, you kissed me and then Muki licked me and I suddenly got scared that you had turned into a dog, Axel said before opening his eyes.

We continued on to Tuckers room where he let out his usual elephant noises to show his discern for mornings and then on to Brevitt who let out an enormous shriek when discovering that I had thrown away all of his clothes with holes in them. This set off a chain of tears with his brothers who became petrified that I had done the same with their beloved ragged clothes.

I looked at Wade in the midst of the wailing and we got the giggles. Nice try Mommy, he said. Before they left I smothered them in kisses and kicked their little bottoms out of the door, locking it behind them, and racing to my computer to look up who exactly was this Saint Valentine who had set me up for complete disappointment all of these years.

Who is St. Valentine?

The true story behind Valentine’s day is still one big mystery, but one fact that appears to ring true is that St. Valentine was a sympathetic, heroic, and romantic figure, back around 270 A.D, ahead of his time I guess.

At they say:

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine’s actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first “valentine” greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl ? who may have been his jailor’s daughter ? who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed “From your Valentine,” an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal. It’s no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France. END

Whether you buy into this overly commercialized day or not, it seems like a good excuse to at least try to shower your loved ones with….well….love, whether they are ready to receive it or not, and if you don’t expect anything in return, the love that you emit should make you feel good for at least the day. Try it, you might find yourself floating on some indeterminable cloud.

Ill leave you with a poem by Pablo Neruda that I read to Wade at our wedding ceremony:

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: where I does not exist nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.”
– Pablo Neruda, “Love Sonnet XVII”

12 thoughts on “Training Husbands on Valentine’s Day

  1. This hit the spot! I had a similar dream…bought my boys each a new shirt and wrapped it up in colorful paper with bows…even wrapped up a slinky for each from our dog…Bailey…wrote a love letter for my husband got up early with a smile on my face…then they woke up! My 10 year old didn’t like how his shirt fit him…he’s timid about his broad shoulders and felt like it made them look even bigger…I was sad because I want him to look in the mirror and see what I see…a handsome, funny, intelligent and strong boy…he thought I was upset because he didn’t want to wear the shirt and both of us felt horrible. As he left, he turned around and kissed me and said, “Happy Valentine’s Day Mom, I’ll try the shirt on after it’s washed”. I looked into his eyes and said don’t worry about the shirt…just be joyful today and every day”, and there was so much I wanted to explain, but know he would never understand right now. I took a deep breath and convinced myself, it’s ok and beyond my control so “let it go”… So, I sat down to work and saw your Roaring Fork Valley video and had a good cry! Reading your post made me realize…I’m not alone! Yes, let’s remind each other to keep it simple and enjoy the ride! Thanks for sharing your gift with the rest of us! Happy Valentine’s Day!


    1. Well Taya, I am certainly feeling the love from you today! I have no doubt that your sweet little, growing boy has no doubt how much you love him. Your description is beautiful, put me right there with you wishing I could relay your message to him, but he knows it already. They are in such an awkward stage right now, growing out of childhood and into beautiful boys.

      Glad I could help you to release some tears, a good cry is all we need on Valentine’s Day!!

      Love you, J


  2. Hi Jillian! Another wonderful holiday, compliments of Hallmark. Not much into this one. I’d rather give “I love you” cards randomly – it seems to mean more. It also saves one from having any expectations on Feb 14, like it should be different and special and if it’s not one gets bummed. No bumming here. I just skip it.
    and I love you EVERY day Jillian!


  3. I had the pleasure of having a sick kid crying that he couldn’t go to school on Valentines Day to get his valentines(candy)..then taking him to work with me no choice(and all he kept saying is this is the worse valentines day ever) and I thought I hate this holiday and then saw your post happy fricckin valentines day and at least it made me smile! thanks


    1. Hey Hilary, just what we all need to drive the message home that Valentine’s Day sucks…sick, whiny kids that have you questioning the true definition of love. You’ll get through your day and the next time your shredding powder with your little ones you’ll remember what it’s all about and know that Valentine’s Day has nuthin’ to do with it!


  4. Jillian,

    Still at work(luckily Quinn is gone) and i just heard the cute ticket boys talking about their encounter with you at 2 creeks yesterday..they were in awe–got a good smile again, twice in a day wow!


    1. Hilary, way too funny! Those boys are charming and so good with the clientele. Ski Co. doesn’t know how lucky they are!! And they sooo remind me of my boyfriend of six years and his best friend, both from Darien Ct. A huge blast from my past. Can’t wait to post my video of them!!

      Lucky you for working with such a comedy team!


  5. They can’t wait either…They are FUNNY and good at what they do! the cute one with longer hair gave me puppy Valentine(everyone in the office) it was so darling I must say it made my Vday!


  6. Valentines Day…..Thankgod for children. That is where the true love is! Although every year I embarress Hayden as I sneak in a card and box of chocolates into his lunch box, when he opens it, all his friends see it and Haydens face turns beat red and he yells at me when he comes home form school. If he only knew…….
    Tasha on the other hand feels special and loved by this (kind) act of love!
    As for me…..I of course get flowers delivered to me by the one man I really wish would just leave me alone. I get valentines day cards from men who i wish would loose my address and not have waisted the stamp! I can’t even say…always from the wrong one because I don’t even know who the right one is….so, as I say, thankgod for children (and sisters and a mother!!!!!)
    Hope you had a wonderful Valentines day


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