A Dream About Dying

[su_heading size=”18″]A Dream About Dying[/su_heading]

My father got his three daughters on skis at the early age of three and dragged us out to the icy Vermont slopes rain or shine. I thank him for giving me a sport that gives me an absolute feeling of freedom without the fear. But in this moment in time, as I watched my friend ski down the foreboding ski slope, the fear came on strong.

I had no choice but to follow and as I made the leap my skis caught a twig and I plummeted down into a deep crevasse. I landed at the bottom with my heart racing. I looked way up and saw light and safety above but I was underneath the snow and I was hyperventilating with the fear that if I moved at all the snow would cave in and suffocate me. I wasn’t ready to die, I still had so much more to show and teach my children and I wanted to grow old with Wade.

A voice inside my head shouted, “CALM DOWN.” I listened, knowing that the next few seconds could save or kill me.

I awoke from my dream, my pajamas drenched with sweat and my heart pounding and I heard the message loud and clear.

During Christmas break I have been doing my best to keep the boys busy outside, despite the freezing temperatures, moving them from sled hills to skating rinks to ski slopes packed with boozed infused tourists and crazy locals.

I need to calm my twitch and find my inner calm and we all need a day at home.

11 thoughts on “A Dream About Dying

  1. Lord your first paragraph had my hands sweating! The ultimate nightmare for sure.

    I too get the stay-at-home bug every once in a while. It’s something I wish my husband would understand. The batteries need to be recharged – a day of open Hot Wheels play, Wii tournaments and alone time reading usually does the trick.



    1. Hello Em,

      There is a U-Tube video documenting by helmetcam a man who gets trapped in an avalanche. For four minutes you stay glued to the screen hearing his heart pound harder and faster until finally he is rescued. This must be the impetus for my dream, that and anxiety!


  2. What a terrible dream!!!! Atleast it was a dream. Is twitching real????
    I have reaccuring nightmare that i am either pulling gum out of my mouth and I just keep pulling and pulling and pulling and it never ends (I mean really, how many pieces can I actually stuff into my mouth!!!?) or i am falling out of a chair lift, which explains my new fear of height!

    (my sister)


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