Does Every Family Need a Dog?

[su_heading size=”18″]Does Every Family Need a Dog?[/su_heading]

Every family needs a dog, it’s just finding the right one that’s so difficult.

We are pretty certain that Thumper was a yellow lab in a previous life. He bounds around the house smashing into things, chewing on his shirt and retrieving balls, hence the nickname.

Thumper has been putting the pressure on us to add to the pack. “Aren’t three of you enough?”I plead. Baddy’s allergies have thankfully prohibited us from having any rodents or furry animals as pets thus far. I never really understood the concept of putting rodents in the children’s rooms. I have nightmare memories from my childhood of finding our Guinea Pigs quite dead, belly up with their tongues hanging to the side of their mouths.

At one point, I had a weak moment and almost bought two beautiful yellow lizards for Axel. They were a special breed that mated for life and could only be sold as a couple. How romantic. Luckily, I had the foresight to wait until after our raft trip in Utah. Traumatized short tailed lizards were in abundance at all the camping spots. Apparently, lizard catching is a favorite sport for all children. Axel caught his lizard and loved and squeezed him all day until he suddenly disappeared. I realized that Hootie-Hoo and all the other toddlers were missing as well and went to check on them. I found the captivated crew crouched around a bucket. Axel looked up at  me with his big mischievous smile and I quickened my pace. They were conducting a science experiment with the poor lizard pinned down on it’s back at the bottom of the bucket. I got to the lizard just as his last exhaled bubble popped to the surface. Mesmerized they were observing the bubbles escaping from the drowning lizard. I considered giving it mouth to mouth resuscitation but luckily avoided that comedic situation when it came back to life and groggily skittered away. I was appalled. Axel knew that he was drowning the poor thing but the result of his experiment was far more intriguing to him.

We came to the conclusion that a dog was a much safer bet. Something big enough to withstand the tortures of three little boys. I decided to start the process of finding a hypoallergenic, one year old, superhero like Lassie. The Gods clearly do not think I should get a dog. I got bitten on the bum by an insecure mutt on a hike and the owner had absolutely no remorse. Next, we took my sisters unruly dog for a walk down Main Street, in Aspen, and he pooped for the entire five minutes we had him. The boys and I went into absolute panic as the pedestrians stared at us making sure we took care of the mess. We did not have those un-environmental doggy bags on us and had to find a tossed cup to clean up.

We visited a dog kennel and reacquainted ourselves with Cali. When I first met her I heard the angels singing. She was perfect for us and I would have a fellow female in the house. The singing came to a screeching halt when we were told that she gets car sick. Not good for a traveling family on the move. Out of nowhere ran up one year old Hootie-Hoo, a beautiful yellow lab with abounding energy. The boys exclaimed that he looked just like the dog from the movie Marley and Me. My point exactly! In addition, it would be way too confusing to have two Hootie-Hoos in the house. I would being telling my Toddler to sit while I told my dog to eat his breakfast.

Next visit was at the animal shelter. The only dog we connected with was Bomber. Before we took him for a walk the shelter asked us to sign a waiver so that we couldn’t sue them. Reluctantly, we went outside and again total chaos ensued. Bomber was wild and out of control. We tried to calm him as he bit at his leash trying to free himself but to no avail. He than proceeded to accidentally bite my hand. I made the boys keep checking on me to make sure I didn’t start frothing at the mouth with rabies. They kept shaking their heads while smiling reassuring me that all the dogs had already had their rabies shots. As we passed the husky dogs who were boarded outside, it was clear that Bomber was hated amongst his peers. The Huskies leaped up the wall of their captive space baring fangs and ready to kill. I hustled the kids along trying to steer Bomber away from this pack who were ready to jump over the small fence that guarded them from us. We returned to the shelter bloody and with our hearts racing. The Shelter looked at us as if we were crazy and told us that we needed to practice managing dogs more. Maybe these dog people should point their antennas just a little bit more toward people and tune in! The search continues and I can’t tell you how excited I am to have more stories to report about later. Let’s just hope I survive this quest.

Read The Muki Series.

One thought on “Does Every Family Need a Dog?

  1. Are you a glutton for punishment! Just tell your boys that all those coyote’s (spell?) in your back yard are your pets. Or better yet one of those cute fox’s could be trained to come by every night.


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